Everyone encounters problems in their relationship from time to time. As I tell all my couples, conflict in relationships is inevitable, it is how we manage conflict that matters.
Some people come to therapy as a last resort. Others want to explore areas of difficulty before they become overwhelming. Some like to have regular relationship tune ups.
However you feel about coming to therapy, I understand that talking to a stranger about your intimate relationship can feel embarrassing and awkward.
Couples can feel like they have failed by coming to therapy. I invite you to feel proud that your relationship is important enough to dedicate some focused time and energy to maintaining it.
I provide a safe, non-judgemental space for you to freely explore your thoughts and feelings about your relationship.
I primarily use psychodynamic couple therapy, which means I believe difficulties in the present are most likely to have originated in the past. Understanding these links is a necessary step towards achieving changes in perception, awareness and patterns of behaviour.
Sometimes patterns of relating are recreated with the therapist and we call this transference. Transference helps the therapist to understand you and sharing this understanding can also help towards achieving change.
Many of the troubles we experience are because we hide things from ourselves. By paying attention to your interactions, I aim to try to help you become more open with yourselves and each other.
Since my training has been integrative, I may draw on other models of therapy while we work such as Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) and Internal Family Systems (IFS), which allows me to facilitate the most effective therapy for each individual client.
I recognise that all my clients are individuals, with different and complex relationship and family histories. What works and supports one client or couple may not work with another. We will work collaboratively to find the best way forward for you.
Overall, I like to work holistically, attending to the link between the body and mind. The focus will be your relationship, but we may consider how patterns of behaviour influence other aspects of your life as well.